Why Am I Reluctant?

A great day off yesterday - despite the weather. We managed three dog walks, best described as soaking wet, wet and damp.  The dogs loved it and there is nothing quite as awesome as huge waves crashing onto a pebble shoreline. The noise is eerie, the power is amazing and you appreciate how much we cannot control in this world. 
So, why am I a reluctant curate's wife you may be asking? (Me being the reluctant one - not the Curate you understand. ) It's just that it was all so unexpected. I was the one who went to church when we were first married but I never did any of the real involvement - just church on Sunday in the good old Anglican catholic tradition. It was my rock which remained secure when life as a Forces wife was often transient.  Years later, when the Curate was selected for training, I never thought our lives would change so much. He never thought he would be selected. He trained part time while continuing his day job - not something I would particularly recommend if you have a demanding job that takes you overseas on a regular basis. He never thought he would survive or pass the first year...or the second.....or the third! My life carried on as normal, with family and work occupying much of my time, I just saw less of my husband - but then I was used to being on my own. Training came at a time when sons were leaving the nest for university and  I did begin to resent the demands made by the training. We had no home church and no family support nearby. But we were finally living in our own home ( on our own) and earning  decent wage packets and I thought we would grow old together. I hadn't reckoned on the demands of a third party - God.